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Joke of the Day

"Did you hear about the new German microwave? It seats 8."

"Can you name all the dissimilarities between men and women? I can't either, but I'm sure there's a vas deferens."

"Wife: How many women have u slept with? Husband: Only you, Honey. With everyone else, I was awake."

"Today my parents told me to either move out or get a fucking job. So I became a prostitute."

"Whats the difference between Jesus and Mexicans? Jesus doesn't have Mexicans tattooed all over him."

"Ukraine are currently third in the Paralympics table, reaping the rewards of their investment programme... ...Or as we know it, 'Chernobyl 1986'"

"I was so excited when I saw the Nail Polish advertisement Because I want to sleep with this girl from Poland"

"The only entities which will survive a nuclear holocaust will be the c**kroaches and a book packed by Flipkart."

"If you refuse to take a nap... Are you resisting a rest?"

"What do you get when The Dark Knight meets Edgar Allan Poe? (x-post from r/funny) [Poetic Justice](http://25.media.tumblr.com/tumblr_me6ovqdnAp1rzkyaxo1_500.png)"