135369

Joke of the Day

"I called the bookstore and asked if they had any books about constipation. She told me it hasn't come out yet"

"What's the hardest thing, being in a room full of sexy people? my dick"

"Taco guy: guac costs extra Obi Wan: [wafts hand] guac is free Taco Guy: guac is free... Anakin: why'd u even pay for the taco? Obi Wan: dammit"

"Just overheard the gentleman in the next stall whisper ""get out of me"" and then start to cry. God I hate the Olive Garden."

"Did you hear about the strawberry jam and grape jelly hooking up? They got marmalaid."

"What is the difference between Susan Boyle and a aircondtioner? An aircondtior can be hot"

"What did the terrorist say when he woke up? It was Allah dream."

"What's the difference between cancer and a black guy? Cancer can get jobs"

"I told my boyfriend I wanted to break up with him for very mature reasons... His dick was too small."

"What picture does a cup get when it goes to prison? A MUGshot."