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Joke of the Day
"Why was the Polaroid fanfiction ignored by the photography community? Because it wasn't Canon."
Next Joke
"Stephen is a much nicer name than ""hen from a previous marriage."""
"I wonder how many husbands out there are frantically scribbling ""free hug coupons"" right now because they forget to get their wife a gift."
"I find it quite sexy to see cum dribbling out of a girl's vagina. But not if I've just taken off her knickers."
"How many Freudian analysts does it take to change a light bulb? Two. One to change it, and the other to hold the penis. LADDER. I MEANT LADDER."
"dad: Hand me that Phillips screwdriver me: *looking* dad: Isn't that a Phillips beside you? me: It says ""Craftsman"" dad: me: Are you crying?"
"Why don't blind people sky-dive? (from ""Money Train"") Because it scares the shit out of their dogs."
"What is the healthiest college? Rice"
"Did you hear about the cook who stole parsley from his restaurant? They had to [garnish](http://legal-dictionary.thefreedictionary.com/garnish) his wages."
"when nothing goes right... go left"