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Joke of the Day
"Science question: can somebody please explain how tiny, tiny swimsuits make Olympians dive better?"
Next Joke
"Do you know the difference between a cheeseburger and a blowjob? (No- what?) Want to get lunch sometime?"
"Musicians... cant seem to get of the [sofa](http://imgur.com/xUunghQ)"
"I hate people who take drugs... specifically the DEA and US Customs. Edit: Thanks everyone for the free Internet points. Appreciate it. :)"
"A man has been jailed for forging banknotes. He also got a big fine which he immediately paid in crisp $9 notes."
"[walks into Halloween party with a hot dog taped to my head] ""What are you supposed to be?"" ME: I'm not wearing a costume"
"My psychiatrist is mad at me, told him I could hear people but couldn't see them...he said when does this happen...I said over the phone"
"As a Malaysian, I thought that our Prime Minister would be crowned the worst political leader of the century But it looks like America has finally decided to us their Trump card."
"[Chasing a man out of the bathroom with a pube] Sir you dropped this!"
"What was Santa's christmas-present for the kid with no hands? new gloves for the cold days"