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Joke of the Day

"The worst part about online dating is when the girl lists her weight as 115lbs, but when you're lifting her to put her in your trunk, she's obviously well over 140."

"A friend once asked if I wanted to hear a racist joke... Her: Wanna hear a racist joke? Me: Sure. Her: Howe Luong is a Chinese man. It took me all day to get that one."

"What's the definition of a 68? That's when you blow me and I owe you 1."

"My son played soccer in the mud all day. He was a little Messi."

"Chuck Norris once threw a grenade killing 50 people Then the grenade exploded"

"Q: What do you call Italian women in a sauna? A: Gorillas In The Mist!"

"A girl asks a guy if she is wearing to much makeup. The guy responds. ""Depends, are you trying to kill the Batman?"""

"What language are you speaking? Cause it sounds like bullshit."

"I asked the barman why he wouldn't serve me. All he kept saying was, ""Too drunk."" He should really stop drinking on the job."

"Feminists have been banned from walking past my local garden center In case they take a fence"