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Joke of the Day

"print out the lyrics to ""Girls Just Wanna Fun"" and draw a red X through it all and you have the Quran, pretty much"

"Next time you're at the bar, ask the bartender for a Ryan Lochte When the bartender asks you what's in a Ryan Lochte? Just say ""I don't know, make something up"""

"BOSS: Okay, let's do this. What names are you pitching? COWORKER: Hannah Montana ME: Assapoopshits Massachusetts BOSS: Michael you're fired"

"who said i can't tell the difference between humans and fruit? are you bananas"

"What if you told a lie to cover up your affair, and the lie was so good that 2000 years later people were still giving each other presents?"

"""I'm smart. Everyone else is stupid"" - everyone"

"my girfriend ask me ,""what about date"" i say ""the rate of dates are so high in the market"". sorry...."

"They say we're in an economic slump, but sales of 2011 calendars have never been better!"

"im back with another knee slapper !! ""i leterally did nazi see that coming! - an frank funny joke am i righte ??"

"How do you tell the difference between the front and back of a tree? Go to the toilet, because you would never shit in front of a tree."