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Joke of the Day

"I was going to make one of those Bitstrips cartoons, but then I decided to pick the lint out of my belly button instead. I'm pretty sure I came out ahead"

Next Joke
 
"The first messenger to say ""Don't kill the messenger"" definitely got killed in the face."
"Everyone can stop painting. We all have cameras that can take perfect pictures of everything."
"I picked my nose in traffic today. Secretly hoping a tweeter who had run out of joke material saw me. You've gotta give to get, people."
"WhatsApp..... Person is typing... Person is typing... Person is typing... Person is typing... Person is typing... Person is typing... Person says: hi"
"What's the difference between a Mercedes and a bunch of dead babies? I don't have a Mercedes in my garage."
"among countless other horrible crimes the KKK also ruined the badass title of ""Grand Wizard"" for every other organization forever"
"A drunk goes to a Horse track... and asks the a horse if he's going to win. The horse replies ""Just say Neigh to gambling!"""
"What's the difference between a drummer in a rock'n'roll band and an extra large pizza? The extra large pizza can feed a family of four."
"Dear Restaurant Managers: If more than 3 employees ask me how I'm enjoying my meal, I begin to wonder if you know something I don't know."