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Joke of the Day

"Daughter: How was your day, Daddy? Me: Pretty busy, lots of meetings and deadlines. Her: DEAD LIONS!?!"

"How did Obama celebrate his reelection? He hosted a Democratic Party."

"What stops your hair from falling? The floor"

"Woman in bed: Aaagh! Aaagh! A ghost just floated into my room! Ghost: Don't worry ma'am I'm just passing through."

"Why is Santa so jolly? Because he knows where all the naughty girls live"

"I keep forgetting - which Disney princess is it who solves all her own problems without trying to find a boyfriend?"

"No one really expected the Avatar porn It kinda just came out of the blue"

"What do Pavlov's dogs call storefront bell-ringers? The Salivation Army."

"If a geologist is in deep schist, it probably isn't very gneiss"

"Cooking is actually really easy for anyone to do It's just that most people don't have thyme."