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Joke of the Day

"How many Roman pirates does it take to change a light bulb? I I"

"Hipsters hate rivers. Too mainstream."

"Visiting grandma (nsfw) Mommy, mommy, I don't want to visit grandma today! ""Shut up and keep digging, boy."""

"On Canadian twitter they should give us 148 characters. We have extra U's in words like colour & the ""eh"" we need to add at the end."

"How did Harry Potter get down the hill? By walking... J. K. Rowling"

"After twelve years of therapy my psychiatrist said something that brought tears to my eyes. ""No hablo ingles."""

"Silly Boy Boy: where are you going now? Girl: For suicide.. Boy: Then, why so much make-up? Girl: You idiot.... Tomorrow my photo will come in Newspaper..!!"

"I'm putting ""open bar"" on my invitations, but its gonna be a cash bar. Just because its my 3rd wedding doesn't mean u can skip it, slackers."

"Why was the menopausal hooker so noisy in the sack? Whore moans"

"What do you cal a man with no arms and no legs fighting with his cat? Claude"