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Joke of the Day

"I just got smiled at by a lovely cashier who has plenty of teeth, but clearly only brushes her favorites."

"I like watching horror films hiding behind he sofa That way, my neighbors don't know I'm there Credit to Jim Carr"

"Harambe walks into a bar. Bartender: What will you be having to drink? Harambe: I'll have just ice. Bartender: Just ice? Me: Yes, justice for Harambe."

"Why doesn't Santa Claus have any children? Because he only comes once a year and it is always down the chimney."

"My wife divorced me after years of daily penis enlargement surgeries. She couldn't take it any longer."

"when i found out i won the World's Saddest Man award i became slightly happy and was immediately stripped of my title"

"Just want to thank my mailman for delivering my recycling directly to my house."

"Glad I read the label on that Clorox. I was about to rub it in my eyes and keep it in the reach of so many children."

"What is the most common pickup line in a gay bar? Can I push in your stool?"

"My girlfriend hates when I make jokes about her weight... She needs to lighten up."