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Joke of the Day

"What kind of computer sings? A Dell"

"People who continually put the toilet paper roll in backwards are evolutionary dead-ends, like the Neanderthal."

"There are two types of people in this world, Those who can extrapolate from incomplete data."

"I'll never sleep with a golfer again. The last one kept trying to use a wedge to get the ball in the hole."

"What's the difference between a poor marksman and a constipated owl? One shoots and shoots but can't hit, and the other..."

"A good way to make friends is to crawl under the bathroom stall quickly before they can get away"

"Today i felt like a giant mushroom I get kept in the dark and fed shite"

"Did you know that Matthew Broderick was the first Iron Man in the movies? He was Ferrous Bueller."

"Don't trust anyone who wants to ""get you out of your comfort zone."" Why would you ever want to leave something called a comfort zone?!"

"ER: Ma'am, are you allergic to any medications? Me: I'm not answering your silly questions until you give me the wifi password."