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Joke of the Day
"It was so cold out this morning... ...that I saw a lawyer sticking his hands in his *own* pockets."
Next Joke
"If someone feeds you alphabet soup... Is that putting words in your mouth? Also, if they are about to feed you and pull back, is that taking the words out of your mouth?"
"dont call my cell phone unless i know you and really even if i know you dont call my cell phone"
"Rene Angelil passed away recently, long time manager and husband of Celine Dion. At the funeral a devastated Celine sobbed ""It's ok , my heart will go on"""
"What would To Kill a Mockingbird be called if Harper Lee was an alcoholic? Tequila Mockingbird."
"Whats the difference between a park bench and an artist? A park bench can support a family of four."
"I wrote a poem about the NFL It has 32 offensive lines."
"Not a very good poem. I dig. He digs. She digs. We dig. They dig. Everyone digs. I know it's not a very good poem, but it's very deep."
"I told my friend that I'm getting a divorce. ""What about the kids?"" he asked. I said, ""they're still together."""
"I saw some porn with Charlie Brown music in it and it really didn't fit the mood."