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Joke of the Day

"I wonder what the bees inside Wilma Flintstone's vibrator talked about: ""Another fight with Fred? Looks like we're working overtime again."""

"if ur worried ur not gonna get a New Years Eve kiss just remember that Valentines Day is in 45 days n ur probably gonna b alone for that too"

"[First Date] HER: Do you consider yourself a feminist? ME: Oh I'm not feminist at all! HER: ME: In fact, some of my best friends are women."

"If a geologist is in deep schist, it probably isn't very gneiss"

"Did you hear about the two deaf men who walked into a bar? Neither did they."

"""if you could be any animal what would you be"" a cat ""why a cat"" [imagines being a complete shithead for literally no reason] naps and stuff"

"What's Hitler's favorite board game? Gas Who?"

"My hamster died at the weekend... ... he fell asleep at the wheel"

"What did the Irish man and the mongol woman name their child? Lepre Kahn"

"What is the capital of Greece? $20 (A friend told me this a few days ago)."