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Joke of the Day

"I feel sorry for people that haven't found their true love. My sister is on her 5th."

"What does the cow say while having sex? Nothing... she just mmmooOOOAAAANNnnnsssss..."

"Why did the dog run in circles? He was a watchdog and needed winding."

"[being pushed into the middle of a dance circle] please, I have a family"

"So I finally decided to read one of Freud's books today... It's been shitting on my self for awhile now."

"Why did the perv go into Victoria's Secret? The panties were half off"

"How many SEC football players does it take to screw in a lightbulb? 1. And they get 3 credits for it."

"I hate it when I have lots of visitors but only enough chloroform for one and have to use it on myself."

"I don't drink, smoke or swear. Holy shit! I dropped my cigarette into my beer!"

"My parents won't say which of their six kids they love the best, but they have told me I finished just out of the top five."