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Joke of the Day
"Knock knock Who's there? Police. Your wife has been involved in a terrible car accident."
Next Joke
"I just saw a guy put a hamburger between 2 pancakes so I proposed on the spot and he just said ""no"" so he's obviously the smartest man alive"
"Don't trust anybody who owns a working printer."
"if trump was president and made trump insurance... the slogan would be ""trump insurance,we build a wall around your house"""
"No pants were worn during the making of this tweet."
"I know almost 100 jokes about scales, but only 1 of them is good... All the rest are tareable"
"If you could create a pill, what would it be for and what would the side effects be?"
"[murder trial] LAWYER: So you unplugged your wife's life support for five minutes? COMPUTER TECH: Sometimes that works."
"*puts little Santa hat on cat* Hahaha Santa claws *puts little Santa hat on dog* Hahaha Santa paws"
"[Possible GOT Spoilers] What's Rickon Stark's favourite band? One Direction"