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Joke of the Day

"What did the egg say to the boiling water? ""It's going to take me a while to get hard, I just got laid by this chick"""

"I was lying in bed yesterday... I looked up and saw the beautiful night sky, the moon, and the stars. Then I wondered... Where the fuck is my roof?"

"Why do Native Americans make the best strippers? Their dancing can make it rain."

"Always a bridesmaid, never a new world-order leader in a post-apocalyptic all-powerful matriarchy. Sigh."

"Why don't Italians like Jehovah's Wittness? They don't like any witnesses."

"You want to know what marriage is like? Think of a prison... Now don't change anything."

"""Cool calculator watch dude."" ~nobody since 1987."

"Why don't they have gambling in Africa? There are too many cheetahs."

"Somebody said you sound like an owl"

"What do you call an orc's wolf with particularly short legs? A Worgi"