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Joke of the Day

"No child donuts left behind."

"I prefer to think in terms of ""good"" cholesterol and ""misunderstood"" cholesterol."

"Chuck Norris can watch an episode of 60 minutes in 39 seconds."

"What's the difference between a soldier and a teacher? As a soldier, it is your job to kill people. As a teacher, it is your job to try very hard not to kill people."

"If I ever have a heart attack, I'm deleting my internet history before I call an ambulance. Better safe than sorry."

"The people of Pompeii... Mannequin challenge champions since 79AD."

"When life gives you lemons, you should peel one in front of the other lemons. You know... to send a message."

"What did Christian Grey say to Anastasia before they sex for the first time? Don't worry, I'll show you the ropes."

"Whats 12 inches long and drives women crazy? [NSFW] A still born..."

"Man from Nantucket There once was a man from Nantucket, with a dick so long he could suck it. As he wiped off his chin he said with a grin, if my ear was a cunt I would fuck it."