13284
Joke of the Day
"A sandwich walks into a bar... The bartender says ""Sorry, we don't serve food in here."""
Next Joke
"My DNA is all over this room. So nobody go doing anything all life-sentency in here, ok?"
"Always be yourself... Unless you run into one of your exes... Then... Be a WAY more successful version of yourself..."
"What do you call it when a man has a beer in each hand? Irish handcuffs."
"I don't like having long hair... ...but it's kind of growing on me"
"I like my women like I like my coffee... Ground up and in the freezer."
"I lost 12 pounds in a week. Good thing I'm not a big investor."
"For my summer job, I worked at the zoo, circumsizing elephants The pay wasn't great, but the tips were enormous!"
"Broke my make-up mirror this morning. I thought people would say 7 yrs of bad luck but mostly it's been, ""Your eyeliner is really crooked."""
"What do you call the side door of a brothel in Westeros? Hodor"