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Joke of the Day

"Pete Carroll was approached by a hooker last night but he said ""I'll pass"""

"Why is F-time so much fun? Because F-time is Part-E time."

"I turned off Auto-Correct for the first time, and now my new girlfriend thinks she has a face that launched a 1000 shits."

"Why is the homeless /r/anime mod still homeless? Every time someone tries to give him Shelter, he rejects it."

"Why is Al Gore bad at dancing? You can't put passion into an Al Gore Rhythm (algorithm). Anyone? Anyone?"

"I think I burn most my calories at the gym untangling headphones."

"What do a priest and McDonald's have in common?... [NSFW] Both stick their meat in 10 year old buns."

"My friend thinks he is smart. He told me an onion is the only food that makes him cry, so I threw a coconut at his face."

"Why are blondes bad a judging distance? They have no idea what 12 inches actually looks like. I for some reason could not find a way to phrase this any better. Credit to my coworker."

"[NSFW] what did the leper say to the hooker? Keep the tip"