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Joke of the Day
"If life gives you melons. . . You probably have dyslexia."
Next Joke
"Wait. What? You need two people for sex? What does the other one do?"
"Let's change things up a bit. I thought I found a quarter inside one of my shoes. That would have been strange enough on its own, but it turned out to be a nickel, which made even less cents."
"How did the turtle call his friends? ...on his shellphone"
"What's the difference between light and hard? I can go to sleep with a light on."
"Q: How many 'Real Women' does it take to change a light bulb? A: None: A 'Real Woman' would have plenty of Real Men around to do it."
"A young wife was dying... She called her husband and said, ""Gary, I have a confession: I've been unfaithful."" Gary answered, ""I know. That's why I poisoned you."""
"Why are sardines the stupidest fish in the sea ? Because they climb into tins close the lid and leave teh key outside !"
"Someone told me: You shouldn't fall in love because you might get hurt.... I said yeah: And you shouldn't fuckin live because you might die.."
"My neighborhood is having a meeting tonight about the crazy naked lady and I'm the only one not invited. Weird."