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Joke of the Day
"Lunch. Meeting. Sure, let's ruin both at once."
Next Joke
"The three rules about procrastination. 1. 2."
"Hey morons, when in doubt, just spell it ""theiyr're."""
"I Like My Women Like I Like My Coffee.... Well educated, independent, pretty looking and doesn't nag all day"
"i was just roughed up by a hipster bully. he gave me a knuckle sandwich, but also offered a gluten free alternative"
"Why did the guy spend the entire day throwing out his surplus of herbs? He had too much thyme on his hands."
"Someone just filled me in about those small places in the hot, sandy desert called an ""Oasis."" ... That's where the Arab boys go to eat their dates."
"So, a happy Muslim on an empty stomach enters a gay bar............. Bartender asks, ""What will it be!?"" The Muslim replies, ""Shots for everyone!"""
"I got in touch with my inner self today. I'm never using cheap toilet paper again."
"What do you call a fat alcoholic? A heavy drinker."