131953

Joke of the Day

"I love my Sherlock Holmes dildo... I call him, Bendy-dick Cum-a-bunch"

"The problem with rich people is you're not one of them."

"Me: Excuse me, where's the rowing boat equipment? Employee: Keep going down there, Oar Aisle. Me: ... Employee: ... Me: Or you'll what?"

"you met the short guy who came out of the cupboard? that was a low blow"

"[Stares deeply into date's eyes before going to the bathroom] ""I've counted these fries."""

"What's a penguins favorite relative? His Aunt Artica!"

"I'm still not convinced Mitt Romney was born."

"Who has the most dangerous job in Transylvania? Dracula's dentist."

"What is the difference between a duck? One of it's legs are both the same."

"How much does a birdhouse cost? I don't know the exact price but I know they're pretty cheep"