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Joke of the Day

"Searching for porn gifs... Results be like, ""oh my go..."" ""oh my go..."" ""oh my go..."" ""oh my go..."""

"I'm getting really tired of this shit No, seriously, I've been sitting here pushing for like 25 minutes but nothing will come out and I'm exhausted."

"White men can jump to conclusions."

"people almost never ask me for man advice because 98% of it is ""you should slash his tires"""

"Why do Vegans like to make their food look and taste like meat? Same reason lesbians use strap-ons. They still like putting meat in their hole, but they don't like where real meat comes from."

"Cat with 16 lives There was a cat with 16 lives. It was run over by a 4x4 and it died."

"That dolphin tattoo on your ass was SO hot when you were 18, Now it looks like a used condom!"

"I hope we're past the point in naval technology where loose lips still have the potential to sink ships."

"Santa, Tooth Fairy, easter bunny, a smart blonde and a dumb blonde.. are all around a $100 bill, who gets it? The dumb blonde, because the rest are all imaginary..."

"I once installed a sky light in my apartment. Boy were my upstairs neighbors pissed."