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Joke of the Day

"Why are Mexicans good at bow hunting? Because they hav-an-arrow! :D"

"My dad told me that getting a blowjob is the only way to get ahead in life."

"Relationship status: Negotiating with the dog to lease space in his flat."

"So a woman's eye fell out of her socket and landed in the middle of her breast. ""BOOBS-eye!"" she said."

"How many disappointments can you fit into a van? I don't know, I can't get them outside of the house."

"Had to buy rat poison last week. I'm with a really huge problem at home. Can't stand my roomate."

"Plot twist: name your pets after passwords."

"I was recently asked if I'd judge Mr. gay UK. I said ''It wouId be my pIeasure. It's against nature, against God, and he's going to heII.'' - Jimmy Carr"

"A lime and banana decided to become a stand-up comedy duo and called themselves ... Key and Peele."

"Dear President Obama, I've got a joke for you... I texted it to Angela Merkel. Did you... *get it*?"