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Joke of the Day
"I sexually identify as a counter strike. I find this globally offensive."
Next Joke
"How do you blindfold a chinese person? Put floss over their eyes"
"Someone should have warned me, that when you have kids, they talk to you, like, ALL. THE. TIME."
"I only came to this school reunion because one of you've got my Wu Tang tape."
"What did the egg say to the boiling water? It's gonna take me a little while to get hard, I just got laid by this chick."
"Talking about planets with my nephew. He asked if you could Plow thru Uranus because it's all gas"
"NSFW Why are vaginas and assholes so close together? So that you can carry a woman like a 6-pack of beer."
"First time posting here. I always found this f$%#ed up, but hilarious. Q: Why did Lucy fall off the monkey bars? A: She's got no arms Me: Knock Knock Them: Whose there? Me: Not Lucy."
"I disagree with liquor store hours. It's 8am..let me in."
"Just about the time when you think you can make ends meet, somebody moves the ends."