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Joke of the Day

"What does a Jewish man get when he runs into a wall with an erection? a broken nose."

"How do people get their drivers to murder someone? Mine sulks if I ask him to fetch groceries."

"Dear Apple: When I want to say ""fuck"" & ""shit"" I don't want to say ""duck"" & ""shot"". So duck the iPhone! Oh, shot!"

"Why did the black man go to the golf-club on Sunday afternoon? Because he had a membership."

"What's the Cuban national anthem? ""Row, Row, Row Your Boat..."""

"Today my wife asked, ""would you still love me if I was ugly and fat?"" Turns out ""Yes I do"" was not the right answer."

"What is the difference between a grizzly bear and a limp dick? There isn't one, you can't fuck with either one."

"You'll never know how funny a tweet can be until you think of all the ways after posting it."

"How can you tell if a ghost is about to faint? He gets pale as a sheet."

"What do you get when you cross a bear and a spider? A six-legged, honey-lovin', web-spinnin' **freak!**"