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Joke of the Day
"Hey, how come they're not playing videos on MTV any more? #20yearcoma"
Next Joke
"Her: Welcome to McDonalds sir, may I take your order? Me: *hands her a shovel with mouth agape* ALL. THE. FRIES."
"[on phone with debit fraud] Bank guy: Sir do you shop on line at all Me: DUDE IT'S 2017 WE BUY TOILET PAPER ONLINE BG: M: Sometimes. Yes"
"A talented artist sculpts a dog out of melons. After it looks perfect, he takes a picture of it, then starts eating it. He is suddenly very sad. He was full of *melon-collie*."
"What do you call a person who teaches about Drones? Dronacharya"
"At first I didn't like having a beard But then it grew on me."
"A gay guy and a cow?"
"hello, this is the co-pilot speaking. the captain can't talk cause we both said ""hope we don't die haha"" at the same time and i jinxed him"
"Have you seen the current remake of the movie ""Cape Fear""? It's about a deranged psychotic who is seeking revenge against a lawyer. The question is while watching the movie whom do you root for?"
"How to dress like Lady Gaga: 1. Go to ikea. 2. Pick a object that doesn't belong on your head. 3. Put it on your head."