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Joke of the Day

"I fell of a 50ft ladder today! Luckily, I was only on the second step."

"What's the Italian word for suppository? Innuendo"

"If you were writing a TV show about politics and wrote it w/the storyline of this election people would write it off as unbelievable."

"Roses are red... Roses are red. Violets are blue. I have alzheimers ...cheese on toast."

"Where do fat people live? Obe-city"

"I farted alone in a room and then my girlfriend's dad came in. Now I have to pretend like something is dead in the walls and help him look."

"What do you call a smart blonde? A Labrador retriever"

"A man enters the drum section of a music store.. Shopkeeper: ""Sir, you can play here for a while, but then I've gotta ask you to beat it."""

"Did you fall from heaven? Because your face is fucked up."

"Why did the boy jump up and down on the letter? He heard that you have to stamp letters or the post office won't send them."