129393

Joke of the Day

"I signed up for Binary 101... but it turned out to be a level 5 course. Corny, but I'm still proud of myself."

"I am going to the Antique Roadshow. Gonna slap my tampon on the table and ask them what period it's from."

"I always wanted to be a plumber when I grew up but in the end it was just a pipe dream."

"[1 of 4 car accidents caused by texting & driving] PEOPLE: won't be me [1 in 292 million chance of winning powerball] PEOPLE: you never know"

"Hilter was weird You would think a pig would like people who don't eat pork."

"Sad iPad Why was the iPad sad? Someone took a bite out of its Apple."

"What do you call a guy who wears two condoms? Justin Case"

"Everyone always says that chocolate is like crack, so one day I actually tried it to find out for myself. I still prefer crack."

"What happens when Kim Jong-un gets sick? He turns into Kim Jong-ill!"

"Where can you find a paraplegic man? Right where you left him."