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Joke of the Day

"its 2013 fellas, if youre saying anything other than ""punch out a grumpy"" to describe taking a crap youre a dinosaur"

"I thought Jayz and kanyes current song.... ...was about Ms Hilton's sequel to one night in Paris."

"10,000 years from now people will probably be incredibly confused why they keep digging up dog shits perfectly preserved in plastic bags."

"The leg rests have taken over! Fear the Ottoman Empire!"

"The woman in the Superman underwear next to me does not quite understand how white pants work."

"Secret to success is to know who to blame for your failures."

"I am one of the best fortune tellers in the world. My predictions are accurate 99.9999% of the time. I can predict your future fortune right now. You won't be winning the lottery anytime soon."

"do all girls make poopy? if they do, why do men get hard for them?"

"If a woman asks you to guess her age, always subtract 10 years from your estimate. IMPORTANT: Do NOT do this if she's in her early twenties."

"How to create a clean joke Step 1. Find a dirty joke Step 2. Clean it"