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Joke of the Day

"How do cities decide who gets to be in charge of wastewater management? They hold a runoff election."

"Bring a hedgehog into the library and frantically ask the clerks where they keep the reverse spell casting books."

"Sext I just received from my wife- ""Wake up! You're snoring so loud on the couch, you may as well come to bed."""

"How do you catch an orange elephant? I don't know. I've never seen an orange elephant."

"Why can't anxious people walk on tight ropes? Because they're too high-strung. Corny I know, but I wrote it myself and had to put it out there."

"Damn girl are you a Rubik's cube? Because I am an Asian that knows how to solve you in 22 seconds"

"Getting caught I got caught jacking off at the store yesterday. But seriously, who pays for bug spray?"

"Banned an 80 year old man for life from attending NBA games. What's that? Like maybe 10 years?"

"What do Whitney Houston and Michael Jackson have in common? They both spent a fortune making their noses more white."

"Lone Child My friend showed this joke to me and I had to post it on Reddit ""I was raised as an only child, which really annoyed my sister."""