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Joke of the Day

"Big girls are like mopeds I'll get drunk and wreck them too."

"How tall are the twin towers? 9"" 11"

"What's the difference between a garbanzo bean and a chickpea? I've never paid to have a garbanzo bean on my face."

"God: u can ask me 1 question me: ok if the singular of geese is goose is the singular of sheep a shoop God: [later] devil: welcome to hell"

"What do Jesus and a nerd have in common? Both are long-haired, live at their parents' till their 30's, and if they'll do anything, it is considered a miracle."

"Why did the Raisin take a Prune to the Prom? Because he couldn't find a Date!"

"That awkward moment when.. ...you show up to a feminist picnic and no one made sandwiches."

"My mom moved me away from Texas as a kid, statistically decreasing the chance I ever get the death penalty and that's pretty cool"

"My boss thinks being gay is a disease so I called in queer this morning. But I reassured him that I should be straight again by tomorrow."

"Why did the Tomato blush? Because it saw the salad dressing."