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Joke of the Day

"My mom moved me away from Texas as a kid, statistically decreasing the chance I ever get the death penalty and that's pretty cool"

Next Joke
 
"What's the worst part of a Ukrainian gas station? When you see the tongue drag across your windshield."
"Ke$ha is what would happen if Comic Sans came to life."
"What's the last thing a stripper does with her asshole before starting her shift? Drops him off at band practice."
"My science teacher said he was going to show me his transistor. Imagine my surprise when a girl with a penis appeared."
"What was the Olympic lifter missing from his bar ? Weight for it..."
"People from the UK have been exercising more. They've lost a few pounds."
"Whoever named them ""sugar cookies"" could've tried a little harder."
"It's all fun and games It's was all fun and games until Trump got elected. Now it's a riot!"
"What is the best thing about having sex with twenty-five year olds? There's twenty of them."