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Joke of the Day

"5 Strategies to stop arguing whit your Women 1. Admit she is right 2. Admit she is right 3. admit she is right 4. admit she is right 5. run for your life"

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"What do you call scriptures for blind people? The holy braille"
"To err is human... To admit it is not."
"Why did the elephant sit on the marshmallow? Because he didn't want to fall into the cup of hot chocolate."
"I ran into your mom today. I ran into your mom earlier today, she told me she made $400.05 lastnight sucking dick. So I asked her ""Who gave you the nickel?"" She said ""They all did""."
"My idea of Hell would be Carrot Top and Shaun White taking turns sneezing in my face."
"Garden Water Features by Lily Pond"
"Stop telling me to ""keep calm""! I'm freaking out about why this British phrase has permeated American culture!"
"If you stand for nothing you'll fall for anyone who offers you a chair because standing is fucking exhausting."
"Why did the boy take a pencil and paper to bed? He was told to draw the curtains before going to sleep."