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Joke of the Day
"I like my women like I like my antiques. . . Oriental and fragile."
Next Joke
"A pack of coyotes shrieking at 3:12 AM is less unsettling if you instead imagine it's a bachelorette party that just got a limo upgrade."
"Why'd the chicken cross the Mobius strip? To get to the same side."
"The dirtiest joke I know: What is the difference between a baby and a freezer? One does not scream when I pack my meat into it."
"What Happens When You Put 1 Dollar On A Barbeque? Dolla Grills, Yo"
"I knew a kid in grade school who was born with deformed eyelids... ...So they took the flesh from his circumcision to fix his deformity. For the rest of his life he was cock-eyed."
"Did you hear about the snarky prisoner who smarted off to the guard on the elevator? He was a condescending con, descending."
"""So you met the victim on tinder"" Yes ""Do you often meet women on tinder""? Yeah I've been murdering it on there *lawyer puts head in hands*"
"In honor of Kim and Kanye's baby ""North West"" I will be naming my first son ""Taco"""
"Harambe walks into a bar... ""What'll you have?"" says the bar tender ""I'll take a shot."" said Harambe"