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Joke of the Day

"Shaving with a straight razor takes a lot of courage........ I used to shave my privates with one , but I don't have the balls to do that now."

"I like my baked beans how I like my women... http://imgur.com/tePZMFy"

"First woman on Moon: -Huston, we have a problem? What? -Never mind What's the problem? -Nothing Please tell us? -You know what's the problem"

"What do you call a Muslim flying a plane? The Pilot.... you racist fucks"

"I bought 37 self-help books today... I just couldn't help myself."

"Why was the young boy crying? Because he had a frog stapled to his face"

"I was trying to make a text art dinosaur today. I can't ever get the teeth right. I only seem to be able to do them ASCII-dentally."

"What comes after the third car? The ford car."

"The 2016 US Presidential Election That's it. That's the entire fucking joke. Edit: Woke up to hundreds of messages and FP status. Damn. Thanks, folks! And thanks for the gold!"

"The past, the present and the future walked into a bar. It was tense."