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Joke of the Day

"next time you feel depressed with yourself, remember that you're about 70% water & thats cool af"

"Q. How many line dance instructors does it take to change a light bulb? A. Five!...Six!...Seven!...Eight!"

"I ate an optimist once... But I couldn't keep him down."

"Home is where you don't feel the need to wipe the toilet seat After you've pissed all over it."

"Relationships are like fat people... Most of them don't work out."

"The term ""Grammar Nazi"" is no longer as common It is now called the ""alt-write""."

"When a duck takes a selfie, it makes a lonely white girl face."

"Two cats decided to commit suicide by jumping off a cliff... The first cat jumped. The other was too much of a pussy."

"Why did the duck go to jail? For smoking quack!"

"Prince: the artist formerly known as. . . . alive."