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Joke of the Day

"Patient goes to the doctor about his obesity... He says ""It's not my fault doctor, obesity runs in my family."" Doctor replies, ""No the problem is no one runs in your family."""

"get away from the tree Dad: get away from that tree son! Son: why dad? Dad: it looks shady"

"Are you made of beryllium, gold, and titanium? You must be because you are BeAuTi-ful."

"A person is sentenced to death by freezing It's justice."

"I may be on Santa's naughty list but at least I had fun getting there."

"bloke in the pub The other night, this bloke in the pub was telling me he was a big star in the 80's with a song called ""stand and deliver"". I didn't believe a word he said, but he was adamant"

"Why don't they allow computers in prison? Is it because of the escape button? I think it's because of the escape button."

"I just saw Avatar and I've got one thing to say: Blue Man Group ROCKED!"

"A mexican fixed my deck today... I guess you can call it Manuel labor."

"How many countries' flags make an appearance at every auto race in the world? Two. Libya's to start the race, and France's to signal there's one lap to go."