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Joke of the Day

"A horse walks into a bar.... The barman says. , ""why the long face?"""

"What did Muhammad Ali tell ISIS? IsIs? Pretty soon y'all gonna be WasWas !"

"If something happened to me today, my legacy would be how much my kids say ""like"""

"How many hippies does it take to change a lightbulb? Please help. There are ten so far and they have invited their gross friends to our home. They are using the broken lightbulb to smoke crack off of."

"Things you need to know about me: 1- I'm lazy 2- hmm, one is enough"

"Who sits on Cinderella's keyboard? Buttons."

"Did you hear about the clever nun who got tricked? She was nun the wiser"

"I call my glasses... I call my glasses congress because they are old and crooked."

"Her: you take nice selfies Me: so I'm vain Her: no you're photogenic Me: oh so I'm ugly in real life Her: just say thanks Me: oh so I'm rude"

"I just woke up and scared the hell out of this mortician."