126314

Joke of the Day

"If I ever get a dog, I'll name her Robbery When I get to store, I'll tell ""Get down, Robbery"". Dog lies and the whole store too."

"I can't wear preppy clothes... I'm Lacoste Intolerant."

"What did the dog say when he was sick. Barf! barf!"

"What do 90's boy bands and blue spruce trees have in common? They all have frosted tips."

"If she ever says: What did you just say!? I recommend an immediate heart attack and let the paramedics carry you out of the room."

"What idiot called it a vet instead of a dogtor."

"Sometimes I think you have good taste in clothing as I try on your sundress. Other times I think you need a better home security system"

"She said she was a free spirit. That's good. Wasn't sure how I'd pay for a spirit."

"I've agreed so much with my wife that my head just starts nodding at the sound of her voice."

"I had to fire my tennis doubles partner today. I told him his services were no longer required."