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Joke of the Day

"Call me old fashioned, but I think any woman that can open the lid of a jar by herself is a witch."

"What is brown and gray has eight legs and is carrying a large trunk and a small trunk? A Chihuahua on vacation with an elephant."

"So the batteries in my flashlight ran out... You'd think I'd be sad, but really I was delighted."

"French People and France When god created France it was beautiful, and great. The rest of the world was so jeaulous...so to make it equal god created French People."

"Being a fat guy at McDonald's is like being the muscle guy at the gym. People stay out of your way cause they know you mean business"

"Thinking about going to 50 Shades and eating loudly the whole time."

"There are only 10 types of persons in the world Those who don't know binary, those who know and those who did not know that this joke is base 3."

"My boss asked if he dropped his watch in the toilet Because I was shitting on his time And joke creds to him. I was also fresh out of witty comebacks..."

"Replace Steven Tyler with a bear. Bearosmith. Billions and billions of $. I could do this all day, you guys. Hire me."

"95% of the men's fashion budget on 'American Idol' goes to leather cuff bracelets and wallet chains."