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Joke of the Day

"If your girlfriend sees where you are coming from chances are she is going to get some on her face."

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"Guys: when you're shaving, do the Hitler part first. You don't want to get interrupted and then be running around with just the Hitler part."
"A physicist sees a young man about to jump off the Empire State Building... He yells ""Don't do it! You have so much potential!"""
"Sexy is when a woman is hot enough to flaunt it but chooses not to."
"People say there is power in numbers. Say that to 6 million jews. -Jimmy carr"
"What did the lady archaeologist say I have a ""bone"" to pick with you"
"Want to watch a nerd have a melt down? Tell him that you just bought a android Ipad."
"What does a Mexican motorcycle sound like? Cabrona!!! puto, puto, puto"
"She said ""Give me 10 inches and make it hurt."" (NSFWish) So I fucked her twice and slapped her."
"How do you catch a peculiar rabbit? Unique up on it."