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Joke of the Day

"14 called me an idiot today No, I don't have a 14-year-old child I mean 14 people"

"Tiger Woods... ...just had the worst 9 holes in his life, well second worst if you consider the 9 holes that lost him his marriage but still..."

"How does a mathematician deal with constipation? He works it out with a pencil"

"My brother got kicked out of his house by his wife for measuring his penis. For the record, it reaches the back of her sister's throat."

"HI? ""The test results came back positive. You have only able to speak in state abbreviations disease"" ME? ""yes"" OH ""sorry it's permanent"" OK"

"""A bloke walks into a pub and asks for a pint of Adenosinetriphosphate. The barman says ""That'll be 80p [ATP]!"""

"I'd quit drinking if the lime wedge on my vodka soda wasn't the only thing keeping me from getting scurvy."

"You guys should read ""It's normal here"" a biography of a Chinese exchange student who was sexually assaulted. written by Quinton Chingme"

"What's green and has wheels? Grass. I lied about the wheels. This joke is great for determining someones sense of humor."

"Why was the beach wet? Because the sea-weed."