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Joke of the Day
"*Brings a hammer to a thumb war.*"
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"How do you set a woman's watch? You don't, there's already a clock on the stove."
"What do you call it when two well endowed astrophysicists have a gay sword fight? A Large Hardon Collider."
"I'm going to make a calendar of sexy Islamic extremists I will call it, Ji-hotties"
"What shatters faster than your smartphone screen? A newborn with osteoporosis."
"I'm going to the bathroom to take a dump Can I get you anything?"
"You're supposed to exercise so that you can live longer but if you have to exercise all the time do you really want to live longer?"
"What do you call a government consisted of burglars? A thiefdom."
"A man goes to a costume party wearing only pants. The host asks what he is. The man says premature ejaculation... Because I came in my pants."
"Why 21 didn't invite his brother for dinner? 28"