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Joke of the Day

"""you're breaking up with me, here? and now?!"" ""it's just not working out"" *both continue pedaling tandem bicycle in silence*"

"Did you hear about the Marine Rabbi that travelled the world giving circumcisions? They made a movie about him: American Snipper"

"What's a pedos favourite key? A minor."

"What's the difference between Donald Trump and Mr Smith? Mr Smith went to Washington"

"The barman says, ""We don't serve time travelers in here."" A time traveler walks into a bar."

"how do you know when your sister is on her period? your dads cock tastes like blood."

"I love eBay! Sold my homing pigeons 4 times this month."

"Just shared w/ my son the amazing story of a boy who wanted to go to his friend's house & didn't get to go & yet everybody lived in the end."

"What's the difference between a hooker and a lawer? A hooker will stop screwing you after you're dead."

"Police arrested two kids yesterday. One was drinking battery acid, the other was eating fireworks. They charged one, and let the other one off."