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Joke of the Day
"Thank you, U.S. Senate. I've been asking and telling people things all day!"
Next Joke
"A man is being arrested by a female police officer The officer informs him, ""Anything you say can and will be held against you.""   The man replies, ""Boobs!"""
"Q: What do you call a 30 foot purple dinosaur named Fred who has acne and is scared of penguins? A: Fred."
"How do you tell if a woman is a feminist? She'll tell you within five minutes."
"Did you hear how the scarecrow got his promotion?"
"I used to be a huge fan of Jesus Christ... but then he got double crossed."
"Chopping Onions I walked into the kitchen to see my Dad chopping Onions up. As soon as I saw him, I started crying because Onions is my dog."
"My dog used to chase people on a bike a lot It got so bad , I had to take his bike away"
"How do you make your girlfriend scream during sex? Call and tell her about it."
"You know when your cat looks at your kids like ""thanks to you I've been out of food for 3 days and nobody's noticed"" .....?"