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Joke of the Day

"Chopping Onions I walked into the kitchen to see my Dad chopping Onions up. As soon as I saw him, I started crying because Onions is my dog."

"How is pussy like veal? It tastes sweeter the younger it is."

"How does a Welshman find a sheep in tall grass? Attractive"

"What helps humans get laid but is deadly for fish? Pick up lines"

"Men ask us if we're naked when we tell them we're taking a bath. THAT'S why they pay more for their car insurance."

"Since the pharmacy keeps making it harder to buy decongestants, I've just started making them at home from crystal meth."

"Other than The Aristocrats, are there any jokes where the telling of it is the joke itself?"

"The wike asks his husband: Honey, what do you prefer? A beautiful woman or an intelligent woman? Neither one, you know I just like you"

"I don't trust stairs... They look like they're up to something."

"Legalize drugs. Criminalize dumbasses."