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Joke of the Day

"Overheard from a 14 year old: Why does Donald Trump watch the Olympics? To see how high Mexicans can pole vault"

"[aquarium] *penguin strapped on my back* Ma'am, is that a penguin on your back? No, it's just a backpack. Oh, WHAT'S IN IT?! um, fish"

"How do you wake up Lady Gaga..? POKER FACE ... BAHAHAHA!!!"

"[pitching script] WRITER: then the motorcyclist removes their helmet... PRODUCER: *yawns*...and its a woman? W: it's a burrito P: holy shit"

"Hispanic and black jokes are really all the same... Once you've heard Juan, you've heard Jamal."

"Why don't cannibals like to eat clowns? Because they taste funny."

"What is DNA short for? National Dyslexics Association"

"Baby detective: These stab wounds here, they- *coroner covers the body with a sheet* Baby: OH MY GOD. THE BODY! ITS GONE! WHERE DID IT GO"

"You know why Mayweather won't beat Pacquiao? Pacquiao isn't his wife."

"Say all the bad things you want about pedophiles But at least they drive slowly through school zones."