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Joke of the Day

"Life is so unfair. Why does eating make you fat? Killing people should make you fat. Being an asshole should make you fat. GOD WHY EATING??"

"What supplement did Stallone take during the Rocky films? Ginkgo Balboa"

"Shout out to Clifford the Big Red Dog. He coulda eaten those kids a long time ago"

"I have a CW who can't input data into a spreadsheet without whispering each number so don't tell me about your day."

"Your neck tattoo says ""Only God can judge me,"" yet here I am."

"What do you call a can made in Mexico? A Mexican."

"Did you hear about the cannibals who captured a scrawny old hunter? It sure gave them something to chew over."

"While George Bush was in office... he was informed of the death of three Brazilians in a plane crash. He replied 'Oh that's horrible, just awful....... How many's a brazilian?'"

"Best part about staying up late = total absence of morning people."

"Knock Knock Who's there ! Alva ! Alva who ? Alva heart !"