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Joke of the Day

"Did you hear about the homeless artist who got turned down in his submission for a classic string toy rebranding? It was a no-go hobo yo-yo logo."

Next Joke
 
"I'm not a liar. I have an English degree; I'm an unreliable narrator."
"Lance Armstrong interviewed before a competition - How do you feel about the upcoming Tour de France? - I'm gonna give 110%"
"WIFE: stop quoting Britney Spears songs or I'll leave you ME: but I'm a slave 4 u WIFE: that's it ME: (whispers) oops I did it again"
"A goldfish is a great pet if you're wanting to be forced to explain death to your toddler sometime within the next 48 hours."
"My friend has mexican car insurance. It's called get out and run."
"I'm 10 times more likely to get mugged in Colorado than I am in New York City. Because I don't live in New York City."
"Your baby looks the same as it did yesterday. *Me, commenting on a Facebook picture.*"
"The propellor of a plane is actually a giant fan for the pilot When the fan stops, you can actually see the pilot start sweating"
"a few things i notice while on pain killers: i don't blink, unicorns talk too fast & i can remove my right leg at the hip."